My Unwinding State

by Sarah Schonert

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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    16 tracks tucked into a full color "eco-wallet" disc case featuring artwork by Sarah, complete with lyrics sheet.
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  • Full Digital Discography

    Get all 16 Sarah Schonert releases available on Bandcamp and save 60%.

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Just a Reasonable Facsimile, Songs About Sounds, Wintry Mix, Conscience Calling, Penguin Party, Exposition 1893, Because and Effect, My Unwinding State, and 8 more. , and , .

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1.
6 O Clock 03:43
V1. Six o’clock on my day off and I'm waking up. Shower and coffee but I'm wearing jeans. Want to throw the radio playing in the kitchen. Turn on the laptop to stare at waves. Chorus. I won't be waking up early tomorrow. I plan to be ground into the floor, Buried and carried and ferried across. Might as well be married to the pillow V2. Ten o’clock and I've cleaned up the kitchen and laundry. Piano and vocals I wrote before noon. I'll play it for you later. (Chorus)
2.
V1. I am as you decided long ago. You are as time imprinted on this world. Maybe we should consider consequence. It's not as though I have any room to talk. Chorus. Break me down like a mirror Shattered as a million reflections of your fondest dream. Rearranged in the morning and framed out in your hands And wearing cracks like proud battle scars. V2. I'm not saying that this is killing me, But I think I’m wearing myself down. All this waiting, holes tearing in time. Minutes hours I will never see again. (Chorus)
3.
Crying Miles 03:42
V1. I'm fighting tides. There's no easy way out except for drowning. I'm breaking ties. There's no way in hell I can keep that promise. Chorus. And reasons? I have none. It just is. It will always feel like a rejection. Regardless of the phrasing. V2. I'm crying miles, While I sit here in my driveway. I'm trapped inside My unwinding state. Please don't make me move. (Chorus) I'm crying miles in my driveway. I'm crying miles in my driveway. (Chorus)
4.
Hit Save 04:14
Chorus. Crawling over my skin, Taking fragments of Myself to drag along. My programming is failing me. Words trailing, tangling. I'm slipping. Hit save, for the love of God. Hit save, for the love of God. V1. There are brief moments of a ghost on my face, when I'm ashen pale and my eyes get smaller as the skin swells around them. (Chorus X2) V2. I am stale stolen with my imagination's hand in mine. I bite it back, and it's that expression that you wish would go away. (Chorus) For the love of God, hit save. (Chorus) Hit save.
5.
V1. That look, I know. You're falling low. I'll take this quietly. Please let me. Trade my smile for yours. Give me your fears to absorb, Undeterred as I write it in your palm. Chorus. I stress all undisclosed closed doors. Clean transfer. I scan cancelled withheld metaphors. Commence upload. V2. I strayed awake. You did the same. I'd give all my nights for you. Please let me. Trade my smile for yours. Give me your failings to overturn, Undeterred as I write it in your palm. (Chorus) V3. I strayed awake. You did the same. I'd give all my nights for you. Please let me. Trade my smile for yours. Give me the years to be fighting for, Undeterred as I write it in your palm. (Chorus)
6.
Laundry Day 02:41
V1. Long pause and deep breath. I know that I can get through this. I'll take this time and pray that it just flies by. I'm wishing my life away For resounding, Admitting it makes me smile. Chorus. Hold me like I'm falling. Kiss me like I'm drowning. Keep me a little longer please. I'm not okay. Hold me like I'm falling. Kiss me like I'm drowning. Keep me a little longer please. I'm not okay. V2. I guess that I knew, That this was laundry day. Strange thought, please say that memory preserves us. I'm making me sick inside, For hanging on To thoughts that I am fine. (Chorus)
7.
V1. I put my shoes on and drag my feet. I dust my sleep off and face the world. I feel alone as I pull my weight. I peel my heart up off the floor. Chorus 1. Where did we go? I'm so sorry... I really thought that we were something. Where did you go? Oh I lost you. I really thought that we were something. (I miss us.) V2. You didn't do this. I claim my fall. You dust your hat off and greet the sky. You ain't invisible as you hoped. You smile and avert your eyes. Chorus 2. Where did we go? I'm so sorry... (I miss you.) I really thought that we were something. (Do you miss me?) Where did you go? Oh I lost you. I really thought that we were something. (I miss us.) Bridge. And I'd give anything to get back there again, And I'd do anything to feel that way again. (Chorus 2)
8.
I will be back down soon. I am every piece of nothing Boiling to the surface In a pot of water, Steam straying off into to another Bygone thought of changing states. I will be back down soon. You are very time piece, A found body of purchase, Precious solid ground, Prayers hauled upon your shoulders. Building constants absolutely, I lay them at your feet. Where I hide is where you shine, And my weakness pulls your strength out, As you rise In my decline. And I'm dreading That moment When we pause. Where I slide is where you stand, And my muscles strain to keep up, As you raise A tired frame. And I'm treading Implausibilities. We are Unwinding normal Stretching boundaries To their fraying edges, Strings of bindings dancing wildly, Unglued corners peeling free, Refusing to be mended. I am hoarding thoughts of resting, Passing on the years. Oh quiet resolution. Sing me quickly into dreaming, Safely held, Breathing divided. I will be back down soon.
9.
Experienne 03:38
10.
Maybe I 03:49
V1. Blinked away like unwelcome tears, Dried carelessly By the back of your hand. Did you mean to cast me off, unpatched? Am I so worn that It's not worth another try? Chorus. And maybe I... Maybe I could... Maybe I could be a little bit more for you. And maybe I... Maybe I could... Maybe I could be a little bit more for us. V2. I don't know exactly what I did, Indecisive me. Perhaps it's what I didn't do. Did we freeze outside tonight? Lost our coats And never found each other. (Chorus) Chorus 2. And maybe I... Maybe I could... Maybe I could be a little more for you. And maybe you... Maybe you could... Maybe you could be a little more for me.
11.
Georges 03:37
V1. Rolling in low over the ground. Was that you stretched along it? Strolling off into the leaves, I have to confess I'm pretending. Catching you Out of the corner, Finding my side Blatantly vacant again. Chorus. Sunshine, Vapor, Cool breeze Cutting through humidity, Pepper in the trees. Fog lies, Waiting, Creeping Like fingers through fields, And I sink to my knees, Dew drops soaking jeans. V2. Funny how the memories link... You never stood on this ground. Stunning how the light hits this road. Mornings are worse since the fall. Silent films Colored by hand, Careful now please. My hands, my plans are dead. (Chorus)
12.
Spare You Me 03:41
V1. I'd go to great lengths to not let you see, Grab my keys. I'd pull all kinds of strings to spare you me Falling low. Chorus. And I refuse to tell you that It's all your fault. Look away while I pull this back together. I'll divert the words and set my mouth. It's shell of a reason I stick around. V2. I pluck hollow echoes off of my sleeve. I hold it gingerly. It's a ploy to look at anything but your eyes, Break that link. I swear it's a mirror sometimes. I swear it's a mirror sometimes. And I refuse to tell you that. And I refuse to tell you... (Chorus, V1, Chorus)
13.
WaterWings 03:50
V1. Holding patterns across a screen, Shifting nodes, Shifting tones, Shifting me (shifting me) V2. Holding plans and cross the street, Flooding drains, Flooding lanes, Torrent sweep. Chorus. I would run out of air if I had to bring my own. I would fall to the core if I had to do this alone. Damn me over you Boy, for allowing you in. Damn me, cover my head; it's gonna get much deeper. V3. Leaving holes in lives you've been, Holding time, Holding lines, Staking claims. (Chorus) V4. Getting slower outside my room, Passing cars, Passing wars, Working away.
14.
V1. Still scrubbing at the same stains. Still mulling over my name. Still fretting over gone days, And holding on to hands that pull away. Chorus. I find, Sometimes, That good dreams are more cruel than nightmares. I'll take terror over memories. I try Too hard To make them more real than specters. Shadows don't listen when I speak. V2. Still peeling back the same scars. Still humming all the old bars. Still clawing at the dying stars, And holding on to tiny ashes in a stone heart. (Chorus, V1, Chorus) Shadows don't listen when I speak.
15.
Corner 04:04
I don't know I don't know why I (X3) Promote this behavior. I don't know I don't know why I (X3) Encourage this. V1. You took that corner kind of fast didn't you? I think I'm thrown out to the side. It's not as though I didn't see it coming. Could you slow down first? You took that ramp a little squirrelly didn't you? I think we're gonna hit the rail. It's not as though I can't reach the brakes. I'm trusting you. Chorus. I don't know I don't know why I (X3) Promote this behavior. I don't know I don't know why I (X3) Encourage this. I don't know I don't know why I (X3) Allow this. V2. Those words are burning in my ear, screaming. I think I can feel them in my sleep. It's not as though I didn't anticipate them But they, they caught me off guard. You took that corner kind of fast didn't you? I think I'm thrown out to the side. It's not as though I didn't see it coming. Could you slow down first? (Chorus) Oh I don't know. You took that corner kinda fast didn't you? You took that ramp a little squirrely didn't you? These words are burning in my ear screaming. They caught me off guard. You took that corner kinda fast didn't you? I think I'm thrown out to the side. These words are burning in my ear screaming. It's not as though I didn't anticipate them, But they caught me off guard.
16.
I don't wanna wash the breath of evening from my clothes... Wake up gripping ephemeral; Don't slip away. This rain is messing with my mind. I don't wanna wash the breath of evening from my clothes, Staying out of the rain. I tried my jeans For anything That might give me away. I could go the whole day With that name on my lips, And I could go the whole day With it filling the grooves of my fingerprints. I've been cursed but I am blessed and I am stained, And smiling. I've been worse But I've been better, Maybe once. Wake up gripping ephemeral; Don't slip away. This rain is messing with my mind. I've been cursed but I am blessed and I am stained, And smiling. I've been worse b But I've been better, Maybe once. I could laugh like I did last night For every night, And I could maybe live on hours Less streaming The details of my strategy. I've been cursed but I am blessed. I am stained and smiling.

credits

released June 28, 2016

Written* / Performed / Recorded by Sarah Schonert
*We Were Something" cowritten by Sarah Schonert & Brett David

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Sarah Schonert Peoria, Illinois

Sarah Schonert is a Creative multi-instrumentalist & singer - writing, recording, and producing original pieces out of her home studio in Peoria, IL.

Her style is rooted in classical piano, supported by electronic vsts, loopers, ambient washes, carefully crafted arps, and assorted instruments she has collected over the years.

She gigs w/ her versatile looper, stage piano, & vocal effect pedals.
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